Dear Sirs,
We are the lawyers representing Brian Williams, CBC Sports Broadcaster. We are hereby demanding that you cease and desist in mockery, satire, sarcasm or hyperbole relating to Brian Williams. We will be sending you a more detailed letter in just a moment explaining our further actions should you not comply. You won't want to miss that.
Regards,
Jackie Jang QC
Jang, Chang, Chang and Kang
KANSAS CITY, MO. - Interstate Bakeries, the U.S. maker of Twinkies and Wonder Bread, filed for bankruptcy protection early Wednesday, toasting [ed. nice pun] its stockholders in the process.
In 1978, Dan White, a former San Francisco city supervisor who had recently resigned his position, entered San Francisco City Hall through a basement window, went upstairs, and shot and killed Mayor George Moscone and Supervisor Harvey Milk.
Psychiatrist Martin Blinder testified in court that White had been depressed, which led to eating junk food: Twinkies and Coca-Cola. This further deepened White's depression, since he was an ex-athlete and knew that the food was not good for him. This was evidence of his depression that prompted his murder spree. This celebrated diagnosis became known as the "Twinkie defense."
White's depression was used to establish grounds for a successful diminished capacity plea; and therefore White was judged incapable of the premeditation required for a murder conviction.
Dan White was convicted of the lesser charge of voluntary manslaughter and sentenced to was sentenced to seven years and eight months in prison.
Percentage of Britons who cannot name the city that provides the setting for the Musical Chicago : 65
Provincial Treasurer required. Must be able to prepare an annual budget and stick to it within a tight tolerance of 5 to 10 billion dollars. Must be able to give a 90 minute self glorifying budget speech without mentioning a single real number. Must be able to explain sudden and unexpected, yet annual, multi billion dollar budget overages, by constantly just repeating key phrases like out of control, spiraling costs, and the favourite unsustainable. Must be able take absolute credit for high oil and gas prices, but blame anyone else for low oil and gas prices.
SEVIERVILLE, Tennessee (AP) -- A retired Sara Lee executive missing since he met with a couple about buying his sport utility vehicle was found dead Thursday, frozen in a rented storage unit. The couple was arrested in what federal authorities believe was a bungled carjacking.
Police say James Cockman may have suffocated when duct tape was placed over his mouth.
Good detective work boys.
Fred Ebb, who wrote the lyrics for such hit Broadway musicals as Chicago and Cabaret as well as the big-city anthem New York, New York, has died of a heart attack.
...shortly after watching the Movie version of Chicago...
EXETER, England (Reuters) -- Muppets Dr. Bunsen Honeydew and his assistant Beaker defeated Dr. Strangelove, Dana Scully of "X Files" fame and Star Trek's Mr. Spock to be voted Britain's favorite screen scientists on Monday. They beat their closest rival by a margin of 2 to 1 and won 33 percent of the 43,000 votes
cast in an Internet poll.
