Showing posts with label Abstinence. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Abstinence. Show all posts

Monday, December 29, 2008

Japanese Discover Secret of Virginity

Japanese researchers, commissioned by the Japanese Government have just released a study drawing a connection between the eating of breakfast and prolonging virginity.

Really, do tell...

There are many theories on the links between food and sex, but Japanese researchers have came up[sic] with a new finding - young people who skip breakfast tend to lose their virginity earlier.

In a study of 3000 people, those who did not regularly eat breakfast when in their early teens said they lost their virginity at an average age of 17.5, versus an overall average age of 19 for all Japanese.

For those who had a morning meal when they were younger, the average age of having the first sexual experience was 19.4.

The study, backed by Japan's health ministry, was aimed at finding ways to curb unwanted pregnancies. It concluded that a stable home life discouraged early sex.


Due to an unfortunate translation problem, the English version of the study was inappropriately titled Hey, those sluts look hungry, but was quickly recalled.

A Mr. Kitamura, the head of the Japan Family Planning Association goes on to say:

Those unhappy with their parents - such as for not preparing breakfast - may tend to find a way to release their frustration by having sex...


Yeah, that was my first thought this morning when I woke up to no breakfast. I think I'll just go out and have sex. Then I remembered how cold it was.

Like all of us Japan wants to reduce teenage pregnancies and disease. Also they have one of the lowest birth rates in the world. The low birth rate is a problem for a country that has a bit of a thing about racial purity and nationalism. I imagine they have more than a few Pat Buchanans/Mark Steyns over there shrieking about the future demographics.

While I wonder about how they arrived at this correlation between breakfast and chastity, and whether the study is even remotely scientific, I'm not going to argue about it. If it works it works.

It only seems common sense that you should cook breakfast for your kids. Please recommend this post

Friday, July 20, 2007

Friday Night Moral Dilemma



Friday night dilemma: to watch the Edmonton Eskimos play the Saskatchewan Rough Riders. Boooooooring. Or, to drink the last ounce or so the Dom B&B Liqueur that my neighbour gave me. Actually I gave it to my neighbour for Christmas. He drank almost all of it until his wife found out he had it. Then he gave it back to me with an ounce or two in the bottom. There must be a term for this type of thing. Post-consumptive regifting?

I don't really drink so I may top it up with water and give it to the neighbour on the other side. No, really it's supposed to be weak like that. Its the French, everything they do is understated. His wife is a hoity toity Liberal. She'll understand.

I'm picking the Eskimos over the Riders, but not by much. Less than 1 TD. It will be the Esks 15 minutes of fame this season, and then *poof*. During the Eskimos game I plan on walking around in my underwear and imitating Bryan Hall. Like you have something better to do on a Friday Night.

Tomorrow the Stampeders play the Argonauts here in Calgary. There is no amount of hooch that could get me to sit through that one. Prediction: Calgary loses causing a media firestorm of Biblical proportion. Blood bath.

How will the CFL Western Division finish up you ask?

1. BC
2. Saskatchewan
3. Edmonton
4. Calgary

I'm currently very busy setting up the equipment required to do live coverage of President Bush's Colonoscopy. Or Tom Higgins' decapitation which ever comes first. Please recommend this post