Friday, September 24, 2004

Village Idiot Required

With the shamefully self-praising announcement from Provincial Treasurer Pat Nelson that she will not seek re-election, the Alberta Progressive Conservatives who have been in power since 1972, will have to name a new Provincial Treasurer next year. We realize this is a hard position to fill given the previous stellar occupants.

In order to help our glorious leader, we have written a career ad which will surely attract the right candidate. This ad should run in the Calgary Sun for at least one week.

Provincial Treasurer required. Must be able to prepare an annual budget and stick to it within a tight tolerance of 5 to 10 billion dollars. Must be able to give a 90 minute self glorifying budget speech without mentioning a single real number. Must be able to explain sudden and unexpected, yet annual, multi billion dollar budget overages, by constantly just repeating key phrases like out of control, spiraling costs, and the favourite unsustainable. Must be able take absolute credit for high oil and gas prices, but blame anyone else for low oil and gas prices.

No experience with financial management or accounting is required.
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